Saturday Night

Saturday Night Fever and no fever at all!!
Every day I chat with a lot of friends, but Saturday night is hard to find someone one online, besides me. There are very few ocasions that it's possible to chat all Saturday night long...very few...
And do you know what? It sucks!

Saturday nights are the nights I feel lonely the most. I used to spend a long time calling my friends on this day, but I gave up. I gave up because I’m not a masochist whatsoever and those calls were not making me feel good, in fact they were getting me even lonelier!

My friends are very lovable people and in this last trip to Brasil I just found out that they were upset with my solitude in this apathetic and well-feed Switzerland. One group told me that almost every reunion they have, someone always brings up how alone and isolate I’m and that they don’t understand how I could adapt myself in this situation. Of course I had no alternative besides cry listening to this carrying and lovable talking!

A detail I must elucidate: all of my friends, thank God is really a lot, they don’t belong to the same group and great part of them have no idea about the existence of the other group. I have met a countless cool and wonderful people in the several different places I have being as jobs, universities, political party, cultural events and son on… I'm someone who really like being with, around and surrounded by other people and to joy all this I was born under the zodiacal sign of Cancer! The conclusion is no other than I’m a friend keeper for sure!!

Continuing…
Every single weekend I was listening, on the phone, to my friends plans with this attached phrases…“you’d love this new disco in the city”, or “everybody will be at this party, except you”, or “I don’t believe you are gonna miss this theater production”, or “we are going to your favorite Brazilian singer. We can call you from there!” and so on…

And when I think that things cannot get any worst…I call someone’s house and everybody is together and they decided to sing my favorite song…worst? They are musicians and professionals instrument players and they sing and play marvelously!

So, because all that I have decided to stop this suffering! Calling people on Saturday nights was making me feel much more miserable and solitary than I normally used to feel!!
Well, today I decided to weight the worst move for me:
-crying/smiling/chat in a phone for some good time and then having a nostalgic moment followed by taking a shower with a huge knot in my throat that surely lead me to another miserable self-pity session or
-crying/complaining/mute all by myself, knowing for sure that the only thing will happen to me is the accompany of a book or magazine or my memories, or a silly TV show where I don’t need to think about anything or the emptiness screen of my computer staring at me and begging me to write something followed by a shower to wash out all this sadness of living away.

After thinking about those two situations above, I decided that I couldn’t stop calling my friends on Saturday nights because it would increase my anxiety and I could end eating a ton of chocolate what would not help much. So, as I can’t live without having a conversation with someone, I decided to call friends that I don’t talk for a long time. This way we could share news, laugh and this “everybody was there, except you” thing won’t get too hard on my heart!

I said to myself, "yeah, I’m gonna do that right now!" I got my agenda and I called a very dear friend and it was just perfect!! He couldn’t believe that I was calling! We were very close in college, but we got apart long time ago. Our talking was beyond amazing, full of surprises, laughing and good news. We exchange information about our friends, update phone numbers, e-mails, MSN, Skype, address, everything!! I talked to his wife also and she seems to be very nice. What a wonderful time I had!!!

I told him about my blog and what I was writing about before calling him. He couldn’t believe saying that I’m a party myself and that he couldn’t think about me being alone at home especially on Saturday nights!!

Yeah, this call was full of surprises!!

So, next weekend I’ll call another one and bye bye boring Saturday nights!!!